Tales from the Vo Witch

Session 3.5
A Promise to Keep

Actually, I got a little ahead of myself there.

The ship didn’t land just yet. I had time to save some prisoners from the cage thing on the back of the speeder. I could only get them out one at a time because of the small door.

Gav asked the droid to heal him. “I am not specialised in organic matter, but I can always use practice.” Gav stepped back, “On second thought…” “Don’t worry, you’re 96% expendable!”

I have to hand it to the droid, he’s probably better than me at healing. As I unloaded people, I thought of Keemi, she was a nurse. The droid remarked to Naz “I have organically welded Gav together again.” Naz looked confused. “Did it work?” “He’s not dead, I count that as a success!” Droid seems to be in a better mood. I’m not though.

I only saved 14 people before the ship put up it’s spotlights, and they instantly fixed themselves on several escaped prisoners. High powered laser cannons lined the bottom of the dropship, and they aimed downwards at the people on the hill, thankfully not at the speeder. “Dam,” I grumbled. I had seven people left in the cage. I had to go quicker if I wanted to save them all… and I had to save them all.

Up on the hill above me, Stumpel was hiding in a pipe. He told me later that he had tried to convince the people on Togar’s radio that he was Togar. He succeeded… They also said he boggled up the mission and the whole operation was compromised anyway. Then the guns fired.

I got another person out.

Stumpel dove out of his hiding spot and ran for better cover. The lasers hit the backs of his feet, rapid firing all the way down the hill. The ship moved with him. The noise was so loud it was practically blowing my ear off!

I had another one out.

I started to get the next person out when a spotlight blinded my sight momentarily. I look up to see an alien peeking out through a fairly large hole. I reached for my gun and he instantly put his head back in, and the giant metal claw fell out. I jumped back and the claw latched onto the cage. There was a clunk… the cage was rising. No…

With new strength I started pulling the guy out. It was the alien I presumed Naz had called Mr Snouty. I could see why. We were far off the ground when I had him out. “You’re going to have to jump.” He nodded nervously and so he did.

I looked up at the light streaming down at me from the hole, I looked down at the rapidly further away ground. I looked at the cage… I had four left. If I didn’t jump down now I wouldn’t make it myself. I felt tears welling up in my eyes. I couldn’t look at them… “I’m so sorry.” I whispered to them. “I’m sorry…” I had to jump down. As I fell, I locked eyes with a terrified urchin, and it was the face of someone who’d lost their last hope. I made a silent promise…

And everything went black.

3rd log of WUD

The group has been split. Good. We were sent on a mission to the water world. We were aloud to keep anything found along the way. The good news we found a ship we can keep. The bad news it is been under water far to long. It will take a great deal of time and materials to repair. We were able to get it back to the junk world. We traded for a much needed part from some jawas. They have a massive connected droid…wall? All of them together are able to reason out incredible things. I must recruit them or tell the others to bring them in…

Session 3/4
Slaver flavour

Home. Where machines go to die and people choke on their toxic fumes. I suppose its a home of sorts and its not all doom and gloom. Well, it was this time but its not always. Just usually.

Figured that I may get time to relax but no, the “Force” or whatever mystical asswipe is running this show decided to keep us busy. The local speederbike gang, led by Buttmunch and Jeff (names not accurate but they kinda are) decided to get in on the slaver credit action. Taking poor villagers and selling them off.

Plans are not our strong point and I should be grateful that we didnt just decide to go into the ganger cantina and just start shooting. Instead we decided that sabotaging their bikes outside (thanks to our sociopathic droid) was a great idea and then driving off with them in pursuit. Me and Gav had a little “chat” with the chump outside and found out that it was some of the higher ups that were taking off the slaves from their camp every so often.

Long story short, off we went to the slave pickup point in time for the next delivery. Jeff and Buttface were unfortunately shot in the head by some sharpshooter (awwww) and the slaves were taken by the arriving slaver ship.

Could have cut out losses at this point and left it there but you cant let gangs get away with this crap or it will happen again. Full of righteous zeal and a little gas, we headed out to the swoop gang camp the next day to find out that the power vacuum had led to every damn gang on the planet turning up to stage some kind of gang leader dance off. Hundreds of them.

In retrospect, admittedly a fairly limited retrospect as we later drove away from the slaver camp at high speed with multiple angry slavers in pursuit, it may have been a better idea to wait till the dance off was over. I mean, all we wanted was the info of where the slaves were being taken but no, we decided to utilise our extremely limited stealth and social skills to infiltrate the camp while it was full of drunk psychopaths. Imagine how badly that could go……now imagine it a bit worse but dial it back from us all dying. We got the accountants hard drives but we also alienated all the gangs on the planet. This may not have been our finest hour. Maybe our final hour.

Probably shouldnt be yelling into my datapad recording this while driving a slightly unstable speeder bike but it would suck if you found our history without knowing how spectacularly stupid our deaths were.

2nd Log of WUD

The slavers were not after us. That is why we were not destroyed. We freed a few of the people. Not all could be saved. A plan was made to get and free the rest. Well not a true plan, more of a action put in motion. We had caught a gang member. I put a collar on him and told him it was a proximity bomb set for the town. It was not a bomb but a an open com unit so I could hear what he was hearing.
It was decided to go find the gangers accountant. We set out to there base. When we got there we saw far more gangers than we expected. I made a good plan to have only to members infiltrate. They were unable to stick to the plan. One of them was badly hurt because he didn’t listen to my plan. The captain and I had to go get him. Now under fire we need to get back to the speeder truck and get away. I have doubts…

Session 3 - Gav

It was a fairly boring day, overseeing the droids that were unloading the ship. At least until I found out about the slavers. I met up with the crew right as they got finished with some sort of swoop chase with the ricotta-whatever gang. Apparently there was some drama with slaves being taken from a Jawa town, so naturally we decide to intercept the shipment instead of doing something smart like negotiating. We got into a fight that frankly we shouldn’t have won, and then the ship came.

Session 3...maybe 4...no 3.... meh - Naz
... 4.

It turns out the droid is an asshole.

It couldn’t recognize the beauty of my ship. Told me it would take years to get it to fly. If I had wanted a smart ass droid, I’d have made one myself… AND IT WOULD FLY IF I WANTED IT TO!

I need some herb.


That’s better.

Did I mention the new crew member smells? I think he’s a good negotiator, and will add value to the crew, but BOY HOWDY… he smells like the carcas of a sea serpent washed up on shore. I think it’s the dry air. I’m going to need to get a humidifier installed on the ship, or have my smeller removed.

Once we had the hideout all situated-like, we took off to go meet the family. My sister was not too happy I dropped in with a gaggle of freaks. I’m sure the smell did not help. I mean, we live on a junk planet, and I can still smell this guy.

No one else seems to care.

My sister mentioned Rapata’s gang was causing a lot of trouble lately, and people were disappearing. We’d seen the gang on our way over. I wanted to avoid another row with these guys (Rapata and I had history), but it looked like that wasn’t going to happen.

There were several swoops sitting out front of the local watering hole. Stumped took out the lookout, and i told Bolts to take out the brakes on the gangs’ speeders…. all except one. Fishhead and i got on, and I revved up the engine. I took out two thugs as we sped off.

A chase was on

We sped through the towering hills of junk. Several of the gang bit it right away, but one managed to negotiate the corners without brakes… so I headed for the largest acid pond nearby. I cranked the swoop’s speed up as far as it could go and headed straight for the pond… slammed on the brakes and swerved at the last possible moment.

We swerved. He didn’t.

The swoop made it quite a ways across the pond before it started to sink. Then, the screaming started.

What a beautiful sight.

When we got back to town Stumpel and Gav were already interrogating the lookout. It took us awhile, but we got what we needed. I took out my duct tape, and we taped the guy to a piece of junk.

“We’ll come back for you later…” i told him. Maybe.

We headed out to a place where some sort of exchange was happening between Rapata’s gang and a third party. We arrived before the gang and took a look around. There was a shelter with a beacon, but no prisoners. We decided to hide and wait.

It wasn’t long before we heard the roar of several swoops and speeders coming throug the canyons of junk. Sure enough, there was a speeder carrying a cage full of townsfolk. The gang was slaving!

I got real heated.

We waited until they got in close, and then BLAM! We took them all out. Glorious!

We had liberated some potential slaves, and laid waste to a good chunk of a gang I’d despised for years.

Then, I heard a beep, beep, beeping. I looked at the beacon. The red light was blinking.

They pushed the button.

Oh shit.

I looked up as a large ship roared into view.

Double shit.


Session - Something Something - Naz
As much as I remember...


Where was I?

Oh yeah… we were in a hospital trying to escape with PayDay. He was hurting something fierce. Wires and tubes were dragging behind him as we ran for the exits. there was gunfire (there’s always gunfire)).

We ended up at the Emergency Entrance. There was an ambulance. We borrowed one and shoved PayDay inside. I drove us through the streets of Fish Planet, but the authorities had too many ships flying the skies above us. We ended up on foot and made it to the docs we were told to meet he professor.

Instead, we met the Resistance. What a motley crew of fisheads that was. They tried to stiff us of our payday. If it weren’t for this one fishhead, there would have been one less resistance in the universe. Nevertheless, we got paid, and, as it turns out, we got a new crew member to boot. We also got rid of the dead weight… bye bye PayDay!

We still had to escape to our ship across town. We created decoys, robbed banks, and made it back to her in relatively one piece.

We still needed scrap, so we head out towards the asteroid belt. Along the way, some yahoos tried too fool us with a distress call.Some pirates are super smart… these fools weren’t those kinds of pirates, Gav took to tearing them a new entrance on the side of their ship. Oopsy! All the air and everything else came flying out.

We gathered what we could, The big score was a droid. A shiny new droid! I hope it works.

My boss called on the ship’s broken intercom. Why the knob had to get stuck on10… f@%@cking loud piece of crap. Reminds me of my ex.

It turns out there was an abandoned mine on a meteor that needed scrapping. We made our way there only to have a run in with an old friend. We got there first, but he wouldn’t give in… so we made a deal. We shared the loot, or his arms get torn off and shoved in his eye sockets and other orifices.

He took the deal.

We took our loot and headed hom.


We landed on the Junk Moon I flew in low to avoid detection And dropped off the gear we wanted… including the new droid. I have a nifty little hideout where I’ve been building my ship. I have to say, it’s looking pretty good.

I plugged in the droid. Charge light went on. This is going to be great!

Then, we went to unloa the scrap at the station.

Fun trip!

Session 3 - Bandar Vett
A lot of junk

We were on the junk moon. We had dropped off the salvage and left to go check out the new droid, which the smugglers rescued from the pirate ship. It had already powered up and Naz turned it on.

The droid sputtered into life instantly. “These surroundings are unfamiliar. You have stolen me. I will tell you now, there will be consequences.” Naz coughed. “Hello Mr. Droid, I uh-” “I appear to be in a dump. What is this place called?” Naz coughed again. “We rescued you from a pirate ship.” “Negative. I powered down in my masters base. I repeat, where am I.”

I asked “Who is your master?” “Not a Separatist.” “So you’re a Separatist bot.” “No. Most definitely not. The opposite in fact.” “Wasn’t the separatist group a branch of the Republic?” “Let’s go with that, yes.”

Naz interrupted, “Your master is dead.” “Negative-” “No… No! You’re master IS dead! Read my Captain’s Log you idiotic robot!” The robot took it and downloaded it. “Oh dear.” “Darn right.” grumbled Naz. The droid was still calculating, “This time is a negative. This- This whole log is a negative.” Naz turned around exasperated, “What do you mean it’s a negative?!” “No one would ever do these things. They are too extremely unintelligent. It is not feasible that someone could have this much stupidity.”

Naz took back the log and threw it as far as he could out the makeshift door of his little secret shelter, and I heard it clank against the side of an old pice of machinery a distance away. Naz turned back, the smoke from his pipe coming out in angry wisps.

Naz, fuming, pointed at the pile of junk. “All I need you to do, is fix that!” “Negative. You can not fix a pile of scrap.” “No, the ship!” I looked myself and I could say with absolute certainty that there actually was no ship there. The droid twisted his head, looking at it from different angles. “Negative. There is no ship.” I could see parts from a ship, but there was definitely no ship.

Naz walked to various pieces. “This is the haul, this is the cockpit…” I put my face into my hands. “Why is there half a droid in the area you call a, “Sh-ip,” asked the droid. “Every ship needs a power source right?” I looked up. Yeah, there were other piles of junk that looked more like a ship than this.

The droid surveyed the area. “With a great amount of effort, and years of planning, building, and all with another twenty robots like me also helping, this could eventually pass for a… an animal containment facility.” Naz gritted his teeth, “No. I want a ship. A space ship! That flies in space!” “I can do that, with time.” “Great!” “However, it is quite a bit of time. You will not be alive when the build is completed.”

Naz angrily sat down on a, (because there was no rocks,) perfectly normal hazardous machine part… We needed to clean up this place. Suddenly, Stumpel came into the little shelter. “Oh! So the droid works then.” Naz grumbled under his breath, “No.” The droid stepped in. “I am in almost perfect working condition. This human, however, is not.” “Have you seen his “Ship”?” I asked Stumpel. “The ship… you mean Nazs bundle of failings? Yeah, I know that ship.”

The droid jumped in again, “That is not a ship, sir.” The droid looked over Stumpel. “Are you the leader of this… group?” “Nope. He is.” Stumpel pointed over at Naz, who was admiring his “Ship.” “Thats wonderful…” The droid said, “I wish my programming allowed me to jump off a cliff.” Stumpel grinned, “Don’t we all.”

Naz stood up and walked over. “We’re wasting daylight. I need to check on my family.” “There’s more of him? That is a terrible prospect.” “Someone kill that droid please!” yelled Naz as he stumbled down the other side of a pile of mashed machinery and out of sight.

Some time passed.

We were walking along a ridge of dangerous looking parts when we saw some swoops coming towards us off in the distance. Naz yelled, “Hide!” So I dove into a fridge. Not unlike the one, in fact, that Naz claimed was his ship’s “haul”. I could see through a little hole in the box, and what I saw didn’t look good.

The droid hadn’t found a hiding spot yet, which was stupid, because he should have blended into the junk just fine, but he decided it would be better to pretend he was a radio tower. Seven swoops came around the corner, and our droid was instantly spotted.

There was some yelling and pointing, and the swoops, one by one, stopped. They were poorly built, almost as bad as our ship. Not Naz’s “ship”, our real ship, (which, by the way, apparently does not actually belong to the smugglers, it belongs to Anatta, who is supposedly unaware of Naz’s smuggler escapades.)

One guy took out binoculars, but the leader waved his hand and the swoops started back up again. Then they drove off in the direction we were headed in, and out of sight. I came out of the fridge to find another argument between Naz and the droid.

“Binoculars, droid! He pulled out binoculars! If he had seen Stumpel we would have all been dead!” Stumpel cut in. “You should really call him wood. That’s his real name.” “Wood” popped up “Actually my name is WD-89-” “Thankyoudroid! Come on! Let’s move!” yelled Naz he beckoned us to the precipice of the junk pile. “We’re here!” There was a pause, “Oh no…”

There were a dozen swoops already sitting in the valley. “The Ratapa… they weren’t just coming through…” Stumpel mumbled. Naz slid down the side of the rusty cliff and into the valley. I looked around. This town was as much a town as Naz’s ship is a ship! Ok, actually I take that back, Naz’s “ship” doesn’t even come close to scraping the surface of what one might call a vehicle in any form, so yeah.

Still! That does not change the fact that this place was just as much a dump as everything else I’ve seen on this god forsaken junkpile we call a moon, or, actually, how much lower I thought of Naz after his arguements with the droid. Honestly, I really thought he was better than that. What should I expect from a bunch of dirty smugglers. Stumpel’s actually the nice one. Compared to the others.

We walked through the Tuputa Colony, not getting too close to the parked swoops, and I realised the other guys were looking quite worried. That was quite uncharacteristic of them, but I guess they were worried about Naz’s siblings. I guess I would be worried too, if I knew what was going on.

I cleared my throat. “Who is this Rapata?” Stumpel looked over at me. “The Rapata gang hates me, probably would shoot me with a chance.” Naz scoffed, “You mean definitely. They most likely would shoot me too, but Stumpel’s caused them a great many problems in the past. They’ve caused us too many problems to count. My family better be OK.”

We went to Naz’s house. Naz’s sister opened the door, they hugged, they talked. His family was fine. I was disinterested in their conversation, so I went to talk with uh… wood. If that can be considered his name. I don’t like it.

He was fixing Naz’s family’s refrigerator though, so I decided to let him be.

I came back into the room. Naz was pacing, “So it’s true then, people are getting kidnapped?” I spouted out, surprised, “What?!” Naz looked up at me. He looked grim, didn’t speak, and he just walked past me and out of the room. I followed him.

Naz walked back into the Kitchen, where Wood was installing a defensive measure on their door. Naz sighed and took his pipe out of his mouth. “Guys, It’s time we caught ourselves a swoop gang.”

We got out of the shack, and Naz was discussing his plan. “Is this plan anything like the hospital plan?” Stumpel asked. Naz turned, already angry, “Hey! That plan worked didn’t it?” “Let’s put an asterisk over the word “worked”, shall we?” Stumpel grinned. Naz glared at him. Stumpel continued, “Where’s Gav? He should be done unloading the salvage by now.”

“That’s not important. What’s important is to talk about the plan!” Naz’s plan was to distract the guards out front of the tavern, where the gang members were, and Wood was to disable their brakes. Seemed like a halfway decent plan to me.

Wood… You know what? That’s just a dumb name. I’m not not going to call him that anymore. I’ll call him droid. The droid got in position, and Stumpel and Naz flanked this unfortunate guy, (who honestly didn’t deserve everything they did to him, so I apologise on the behalf of my companions,) and knocked him out, leaving the droid time to sabotage the brake systems on all the swoops.

“Hold on!” said Naz. “ Don’t cut the brakes on that last swoop! I have a better idea…”

So there I was, on the back of a swoop, shooting for my life, smoke puffing in my face, while Naz actively tried to get as close to crashing as possible. On purpose. “HOW’D YOU CONVINCE ME TO DO THIS!?!” I yelled over the loudness of the swoop. “The Swoops are crashing aren’t they? It’s working!” Naz yelled back, grinning like a wild loonatik.

I winced as Naz skimmed the side of a wall. Then a piece of machinery clipped my shoulder! It hurt. Several pieces started falling, creating a rock fall, and crushed several chasing swoops. I shot at the few that were left, but I couldn’t hit a single swoop for the life of me. I noticed they were both looking very confused. They started yelling at each other. They finally realised something was terribly wrong. A bit too late for that, huh?

See, since the gang didn’t have brakes, Naz’s idea was to go around tight corners hoping thy’d crash. Problem with that? Going around tight corners with brakes isn’t any more of a holiday. I grazed my other arm on a sharp blade even before the collapse.

Naz headed for a narrow chasm in between two piles. “We’re going to crash into the side of the wall!” I cried. Naz just gave me a grin and a thumbs up. Somehow we managed to not crash going in. We slid around a corner and Naz parked. “Get your gun ready.”

So, I readied my gun. So did Naz. We heard them getting closer. Closer, closer… Suddenly they veered around the corner, and we both took a shot. Naz’s shot slammed a guy into the side of the narrow passage, but mine hit a wall.

Naz turned to me. “You need to work on your shooting skills, kid.” I’m actually not classified as a kid anymore, but I didn’t feel like that was important.

Naz revved the engines and we took off, and this time, we were behind them. That meant Naz could shoot them as well as driving. And Naz actually can shoot. Our odds were improving.

We opened into a flat area, although it was rising up. We were surrounded by water, although it wasn’t water it was… it was acid. Toxic acid! There was a little outcropping over the lake of death, like a ramp.

The last two gang members went up the ramp- Plop! Into the lake. Blub blub blub.

On the way back, I was feeling some remorse, so I tried to talk to Naz about how these guys weren’t actual bad guys, they were just following orders. Naz just revved his engine louder and tuned me out. I don’t know why I thought these guys would be any better than the Collars.

I really don’t.

I believe killing people is wrong. Normally. If their trying to kill you, by all means, use self defence. If you know they’re going to either murder or harm someone who doesn’t deserve it, you should try and stop them, even if that means killing.

I find killing mindless underlings borderline on that. They don’t know what they’re doing, they’re just following orders.

The worst thing though, is when they’re just innocent citizens. Let’s say you have a prison break. Oh! That prison guard that’s just doing his job, who doesn’t have enough money to buy the cure for his fatally sick daughter? Dead. That really nice woman that loves everyone who just so happened to have a boring job typing prisoner files out? Caught in the crossfire. That innocent man that in a mix up, got put in prison and it took six years to sort it out? Seconds after finally being freed, you murdered him when you were heroically collapsing the front door down on his face.

Do I sound bitter? I think at this point, I have that right!! There’s so much evil in this universe, it’s just…I… I’m getting distracted. I haven’t even got to the part where the smugglers torture someone.

I sat there, watching as they torture some guy into giving us the information. He was the only one left that we hadn’t killed yet. So they’re slavers. That makes me feel slightly better. I go outside.

The sand I stand in is ground nuts and bolts. The mountains are made of junk. The water is acid. The air is… air actually, but some places it’s poisoned. I look up at our planet. It should be blue, judging that our planet is covered in water, but all I see is black. Black clouds. I’ve seen pictures of what our planet was like before but… it’ll never be the same again. Too much pollution.

If I squinted, I could see the spire. A glowing, white, pillar of hatred and evil. They built it in my lifetime actually. I didn’t realise how tall it was. The dictators live there. The ones that decide our fate.

Let them try and decide mine. “Bandar!” Stumpel called to me. It was time to go.

By the way! They duct taped that unfortunate man to a piece of machinery outside the colony so we could come back for him later. If they remembered. I was disgusted with them. Fortunately, I came out of it soon afterwards.

They fixed some more swoops and we went off to the gang’s base. We met some uncooperative jawas that eventually gave us some information about the slavers and we were off again. Gav, who was with us now, (he joined us when we got back from the speed chase,) saw a landing area up on a hill of rusty things and we decided to check it out.

Actually, there’s some important information you probably need to know about this. The guys found out that the leader of this whole operation is Togar, and he brings in slaves that the gang goes out and captures and brings them to a landing site. Then a ship comes down, picks them up, and sends them to who knows where.

I didn’t get a chance to ask if they thought this was the right landing site, because lo and behold, there were swoops on the horizon. I guess this was the right landing site. Go figure. Stumpel immediately pointed us where we should go for a good ambush.

I went to my spot and got my blaster ready. Probably wasn’t going to shoot anyone, but might as well try. The droid and Gav went in the opposite direction and went around the corner. What were they doing? I had no idea.

We waited for about another twenty minutes. Turns out the “horizon” is actually really really far away, especially when the swoops had to maneuver the maze of garbage. Finally the swoops started up the road up to the landing site. We were up higher on the hill, looking down on them.

Suddenly, the droid came back from around the corner and started moving junk around and then went back around the corner. All the gang members got off their swoops, and I could see now that there was a speeder with a cage behind them… with people in it! I wanted to go down and rescue them right then, but they’d shoot me before I put a foot out of my hiding spot.

They didn’t know I was there… yet. One of the guys down there turned the corner, evidently checking to see if he could figure out why there was a droid so far out here in the wasteland, and why it was so close to their secret operation.

There was a buzz and a cry, and then a head rolled out from behind the pile of junk. THat’s when all hell broke loose.

We were all shooting down at once, and they quickly realised where we were, then we got shot out too. I barely dodged a few lasers to the head. Once again, I couldn’t hit anything. Togar, the leader, was killed first. An old enemy of Stumpel’s, the notorious Jeff, also got killed. The speeder almost escaped, but Stumpel took it down, but managed to not kill the people inside as well.

One by one, we picked down the bad guys. Or at least, the others were. I still was completely useless as usual. Gav and the droid we’re down on the pad, doing what we were doing melee style, and Gav was using his new vibrosword to slice through people like cheese.

One guy managed to press a button on the control panel of a giant radio tower looking thing. Naz shot him down.

Suddenly, a blaster shot hit my shoulder! I had gotten hit before, but it didn’t change how much it hurt! I got hit again, and I started to see red. I wiped it away. I could handle it. I saw Gav was fighting three at once, and he was starting to break down. One burly man raised his weapon over Gavs head, so I took a deep breath, and I fired, hitting the guy full in the chest. I shot him again, and he fell over, dead.

Not my first kill, but my first that didn’t involve indirect traps and trickery. I’d never even hit anyone with a blaster before. Then Naz shot the last man.

And we stood, victorious, all injured but all alive, triumphant. And as we did, the sky arose with sounds of a landing ship, coming down to kill our hope…

And us.

Session 3 - WD-892

Am I starving or dying? Are they the same? I am at 1% power. There is nothing left to scavenge. The stars don’t give off enough light to power anything. Sensors fading. At some point an asteroid will crush this place. Better than being found by them…

“I bet it’s a Clanker spy!”
“Shut up, Kurhot! We wipe it and it works for us!”
“Boss, it’s havin’ a listen to us…”


100% power…
Where am I…?
Why did this human hit me?
And why am I in a junk yard?
The human wants me to fix his ship. Good. I have the skills and it will give me the time I need and a ship to escape.
He does not have a ship. He has a few piles of scrap. Not bad scrap. But still scrap.
I don’t think I will need to fear this human’s control.
By the Maker, he is a captain. Others follow him. This is doom.
Well, this has some hope. I should be getting an equal share of profits.
The Captain and another crewmate are in a high speed chase with a local ganger group.
With my help all of the gangers’ swoops have low-function brakes. Not sure what their plan would have been if I wasn’t here.
The gang seems to be a middle-man in a slaver operation. The crew wants to stop them. Good. With time they may all be of use to me and my plans.

We have set an ambush for the gang.
The ambush went well.
I, however, fell down a junk slope and scuffed my primary right arm and scratched my left leg. Estimated time of repair: ten minutes. Oh, and the crew mate — named Gav — was beaten bloody.
Update: The slavers are landing. We are spread out and wounded.
The odds are not in our favor…

Session 2 - Stumpel
Back to normality with a few bangs

Meant to keep this thing up to date but you know…life…alcohol…people trying to shoot me. I had grand visions last time after rescuing the wheelchair guy that we might be working with the resistance, fighting for ideals and making serious cash. Turns out the resistance was a bunch of ragtag nobodies, who tried to stiff us on our payment. Admittedly they are less amateur than we are but still, there is a reason they are a resistance and not in power.

They even offloaded one of their rejects on us, who admittedly endeared himself to us by getting us a good deal. Seems like a nice…fish…kid, a touch green about the gills maybe (har har!) but he brings something to our motley crew that we were missing (the ability to talk for more than 5 seconds before resolving an issue with a blaster).

Its not so bad living our life I suppose. On the way back home, we followed a bogus distress call but didnt fall for it. Turns out a trap dont work so well when your ship gets a claw sized hole in its side. Now I suppose that in itself should make for a tale of high fantasy but its part of our daily existence. Collectively we are sort of like a wounded rancor that has been shot full of stimulant, lumbering from one fight to another, ripping heads off and shitting in inappropriate places. It works for now but its hard not to long for more, ideally before the rancor trips over its own feet and impales itself on a spike. I have a whole load of bad karma to balance out and blasting pirate assholes into space only counts as a minor positive.

The boss was pissed we were late but I dont think Naz really cares too much. Pacified the boss by heading off to some salvage co-ordinates just in time to run into some other lowlifes like ourselves. Cue some metaphorical dick waving and the salvage was split. Got some interesting stuff. Weird looking droid that had Naz all excited in case it was a real mechanic. As long as it does more than smack things with a wrench, it will be better than Naz. We might even get a functional ship eventually.

Time to go home. The smell of unholy chemical reactions, rust so rusty that its rusted, the sound of jawas gibbering and scumbags scheming. Yay?


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